Monday, August 25, 2014

Disgraceful Young Or Elder?

Politeness has long became elder favorite subject of critisizing young generation. They love to say how most of adolesecent and young adult’s skill of communication are lacking, not in the term of uneffective communication but manner degression. In the country where manner is considered superior than matter, a new generation who use simplified interaction are often disregard.

Elder wants to teach about manner so bad that they incorporate this subject in formal teaching formed under school curricula. Art, Culture and Skill (SBK) is a subject in primary to high school which teaches Indonesian culture in not only form of art but also in form of life skill (communication included). I don’t object the teaching of SBK in school since what I know from my litlle brother textbook, it looks like a fun informative cultural rich subject. However, such life skill of communication should not be taught formally as it is human’s natural ability. Sooner or later they will be able to do it.

The main goal of communication is to deliver and receive messages. Form of communication itself are varied depended on multiple factors. Whichever form of communication used, they are all considered good as long as it can effectively send intended messages. However, people in Indonesia are more interested in manner heavy rather than matter heavy. Sweet flowery talks are considered better than meaningful straightforward talks. Those who talk short are considered as rude and disgraceful. Perhaps, it becomes one of the reason why our officials are smart talker instead of hard worker.

In fact, cultural heavy communication form has been responsible for many airplane crashes in 1980s and 1990s. Quoted from Malcolm Gladwell book, Outliers, between these years Korean Air were crashing so often because miscommunication between flight attendants. Korean, like Indonesian, are strictly bound to their traditional culture, even in modern aviation industry. One of the cockpit conversation from the crashed plane, recorded in Black Box, found that Korean Air co-pilot were keep using ‘code’ of disagreement to show his objection of captain decision, instead of straightforward talking. Unfortunately, the captain did not understand his co pilot true meaning and kept doing his wrong approach, the plane crashed as a result. This is a life and death situation where people are faced in fight or flight state. But bizarre enough, even in this kind of circumstances, Korean flight attendant were still tightly follow their cultural order of communication, resulting in wrong received messages.

Have thoroughly understood the lying problem, Korean Air then reformed itselves by switch its staff training and improved its way of communication so that there will be no more ‘taboo’ words to say to the captain for the greater good of flight. Following this breakthrough, in 2006 Korean Air was given Phoenix Award by Air Transport World in recognition of its transformation.

Communication obstacles are also occured in medicine due to its hierarchaly structured arrangement. At the top of the chain is professor, folowed by senior consultant then junior consultant then residents then intern then medical students at the bottom of the chain. But in other acclaimed chain, senior nurse is placed above resident, followed by general nurse then intern then medical students. By this form of hierarchy, message is transported carefully from chain to chain, don’t dare skip any of it if you don’t want to be labelled as rude brat. Also important to be noted that, you need to first use flowery sweet talk to begin every conversation with everyone on the chain, upper or lower. Being rude brat can get you in trouble and will make you kicked out from any possible social interaction.

Medicine is one of the field that mostly faced with life and death decision but strangely practice in calm aristocratic way. It is necessary to rapidly response and decide on any given cases, especially emergency. Ideally in this kind of circumstances, politeness should be taken aside and straightforward (though may also be rude) talking supposed to be considered as prime. In the utopion world, any social uncomfort following this out of order socially structured interaction will be forgotten and forgiven.

Culture is our society’s color. It should festives our interaction with others, not isolate us and enstrange ourselves inside a list of allowed or unallowed manner accroding to politeness. Elder should be wiser in seeing this matter, instead of being easily offended by minor misconduct. It is necessary to preserve our culture in young generation yet, exaggerated way of preserving will further distance the young from the elder. As a consequence, young people may be sick of their own culture and grow out of it completely. So tell me which one of them is more disgraceful?

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